#TGIFshared: Apa itu “Penyakit” Seksis? Dapatkah Kita Mencegahnya?

Sejak dahulu, ketika kita masih kecil, pasti di lingkungan keluarga dan pertemanan sering sekali diajarkan atau ditekankan bahwasanya perempuan itu harus rapih, bersih, cantik pakai pita warna-warni, pinter dandan, jago masak, dan sebagainya. Sedangkan laki-laki harus berani, tidak boleh cengeng, haram hukumnya pakai rok, harus kuat, harus bisa jadi pemimpin dan juga sebagainya. Sehingga stereotip seperti itu, semakin tertanam di benak kita dan sengaja tidak sengaja kita sendiri yang menyebarluaskan anggapan-anggapan tersebut dan semakin melanggengkan ‘penyakit’ seksis itu sendiri. Hal ini yang menjadi akar dari seksisme itu sendiri, dimana adanya stereotip gender di dalam masyarakat.

Tapi sebenarnya apakah itu seksis dan seksisme?

Seksisme merupakan salah satu bentuk diskriminasi, prasangka, penindasan, stereotip berdasarkan jenis kelamin atau gender atau keyakinan, yang beranggapan bahwa laki-laki lebih tinggi (superior) dari perempuan (inferior), sehingga dengan demikian bentuk diskriminasi ini dibenarkan. Keyakinan seperti itu dapat kita sadari atau tidak disadari, seperti contoh yang telah saya sebutkan diatas.

Bentuk diskriminasi seksis yang lebih sering dialami oleh kelompok perempuan dan anak perempuan ini merupakan salah satu sarana untuk mempertahankan dominasi dan kekuasaan laki-laki, yang sejak dahulu hingga kini dapat kita lihat dengan mudahnya hampir di setiap lini sektor diantaranya sektor ekonomi, politik, sosial maupun budaya.

“Simple peck-order bullying is only the beginning of the kind of hierarchical behavior that can lead to racism, sexism, ethnocentrism, classism, and all the other ‘isms’ that cause so much suffering in the world.”

Octavia Butler

Apa saja yang termasuk kategori seksisme?

  1. Sikap, situasi atau ideologi seksis, termasuk diantaranya keyakinan, teori dan gagasan yang memegang satu kelompok (biasanya laki-laki) sebagai hal yang dilihat pantas menjadi lebih unggul dari kelompok lainnya (biasanya perempuan). Disamping itu, mereka juga membenarkan adanya penindasan kelompok lain atas dasar jenis kelamin atau gender.
  2. Adanya praktik-praktik dan institusi seksis, salah satu cara dimana biasanya penindasan terjadi. Biasanya hal ini terjadi tanpa disadari karena sudah terbiasa dan didukung oleh suatu sistem yang sudah ada sejak dahulu.

Apa hubungannya dengan feminisme?

Kata seksisme dikenal secara luas sejak Gerakan Pembebasan Perempuan (Women’s Liberation Movement) pada tahun 1960an. Saat itu, teoritisi feminis menjelaskan bahwa penindasan terhadap wanita tersebar luas hampir di seluruh lini masyarakat. Sejak saat itu mereka mulai berbicara mengenai seksisme yang mengacu pada perilaku kolektif yang mencerminkan masyarakat secara keseluruhan. Seksisme jugalah yang menjadi bentuk pertama penindasan dan diskriminasi yang saat itu selalu mengarah pada kelompok perempuan.

Pada gerakan feminis tahun 1960 – 1970an (Gelombang Kedua Feminisme), banyak perempuan yang kemudian menyadari bahwa seksisme juga hadir dan sering terjadi di ranah pekerjaan mereka yang menyoal tidak adanya keadilan sosial bagi perempuan. Dari situlah, banyak dari mereka yang saat itu berbicara atas nama para pekerja, orang miskin dan kelompok berdasarkan rasial.

Sama seperti rasisme, seksisme juga terjadi secara sistemik. Kesenjangan antara laki-laki dan perempuan hanya dianggap sebagai kodrat yang diperkuat oleh praktik, aturan, kebijakan dan Undang-undang di suatu Negara yang seringkali terlihat seakan biasa saja, tetapi pada kenyataannya banyak merugikan dan tidak berpihak kepada perempuan.

Seksisme juga erat hubungannya dengan rasisme, classism, heteroseksisme dan penindasan lainnya terhadap individu, ini yang dikenal dengan intersectionality.

Lalu, apakah perempuan juga bisa menjadi seksis?

Perempuan dapat menjadi kolaborator baik secara sadar maupun tidak sadar dalam melakukan tindakan tersebut, jika mereka diam, menerima dan menganggap perilaku seksisme ini adalah hal yang biasa dan normal terjadi. Terlebih ketika perempuan, menerima bahwa laki-laki memang memiliki kekuatan dan kekuasaan lebih daripada perempuan.

Seksisme oleh perempuan terhadap laki-laki hanya akan mungkin terjadi dalam suatu sistem, dimana keseimbangan kekuatan atau kekuasaan sosial, politik, budaya dan ekonomi berada di tangan perempuan, which is a situation that does not exist today.

Apa yang bisa perempuan lakukan untuk mencegah seksisme?

Kalau menurut saya pribadi, penting bagi perempuan untuk menunjukkan bahwa perempuan setara dengan laki-laki. Namun, juga tidak merasa dirinya lebih unggul dari perempuan lain atau kategori gender lainnya, sehingga saling menjatuhkan dan merendahkan satu sama lainnya.

Selain itu, memilih penggunaan bahasa yang baik yang tidak mengandung unsur-unsur kekerasan, mendiskriminasi, menyinggung, merendahkan sehingga menimbulkan sikap seksisme juga tak kalah penting.

Tidak sungkan dan berani untuk berbicara dan membela dirinya sendiri maupun membela perempuan lainnya, jika mengetahui adanya perlakuan seksisme di sekeliling kita.

But first thing first, mungkin kita harus meyakinkan diri sendiri terlebih dahulu, bahwa kita berharga dan memiliki kemampuan, memiliki hak dalam berpendapat dimana pun dan kapan pun yang setara dengan lainnya, tidak peduli apa pun gender kita.

Diolah berdasarkan sumber: ThoughtCo

What You Really Need to Know About Feminism

It’s very inspiring every time I read some articles or books which talking about feminism, where most of the times people always seems pessimistic when they’re talking about feminism itself. It’s always full of debates when it comes to people who admit themselves as a feminist. Recently, I have read a simple, understandable and first-thing-first you really need to know about feminism when I was reading an article wrote in Magdalene. Where they are trying to explore the ten biggest misconceptions about feminism which you should know.

Here they are:

1. Feminists hate men: This one is the oldest and most tiresome fallacy on feminism. Feminism is a movement and ideology that champions equality for women in political, economic, cultural, personal and social spheres. It has never been an ideology of hate.

2. To achieve equality, feminism must emasculate men: Achieving gender equality does require deconstructing masculinity, but it is not the same as emasculating the male sex. In its hundreds of years of history (even before the word “feminism” was coined) the movement has cultivated a tradition of deep contemplation and rethinking of the social construct of genders as well as gender dynamics. It is supposed to actually improve gender relations, not strengthen one sex at the expense of the other.

3. Feminism only helps women: Feminism doesn’t just liberate women; it also liberates men by breaking down the standards put in place for women and men by the society. Feminism is about changing self-limiting gender roles, sexual norms and sexist practices. Men have the freedom to explore life beyond the rigid boundaries of traditional masculinity. Also feminism believes in equal access to education, which probably enabled your mom to get her university degree and get a job way back then, giving you and your brothers better opportunities in life. With education, women tend to make better life choices, resulting in healthier and more optimally functioning families and communities.

María María Acha-Kutscher illustrates women exercising their voices in political struggles. She says her work focuses on the woman, on “her story, the...:

4. Only women can be feminists: Feminists are committed to addressing daily problems like domestic violence, rape and sexual assaults, unequal pay, sexual objectification, etc. The best way to address these problems is to involve men, raising male employees’ awareness of gender sensitivity, teaching young boys to respect girls, getting fathers to share the housework loads and be more involved in raising their kids, and so many other ways.

5. To be a feminist you must be an atheist: While it’s true that some religions have highly patriarchal perspectives and perpetuate age-old discriminative practices against women, it doesn’t mean there’s no room for improvements. There have been many who bring women-friendly interpretations into religious teachings.

In Indonesia, we have this feminist ulema and this Muslim scholar and a few others. You don’t have to ditch your religion to believe that women are entitled to the same rights as men.

6. Feminists don’t believe in marriage: How silly. A lot of feminists are happily married. As long as a marriage provides personal, legal and social values to the two people involved, there’s no reason to reject the institution of marriage. What feminists are against is when the society values marriage as a “better place” for women, socially punishing those who are not married or divorced, and when a marriage is treated as a way to control women. Also, true feminists believe legal marriage should be allowed for all sexual preferences and gender expressions (yes, we believe in same-sex marriage!).

7. True feminists don’t wear bras and makeup: Rubbish! Feminism is about giving women choices – not limiting them – of self-expression. Can’t go out without your high heels? By all means, wear them. Fancy that little black dress? Why not. But expressing yourself in a traditional expression of femininity is a choice, not an obligation, and it should not define you as a person.  Personally, I like looking good, but I hate to waste too much time and energy on doing it, so I hardly wear make-up, save maybe brow powder and lip-gloss.

8. Feminism is a western concept: To be honest, this has been one of the main self-criticism within the feminist movement in the past: that feminism, the movement and ideology, is Eurocentric and dictated by white middle-class women. It was also criticised for its tendency to overlook class, caste, religion, ethnic bias and racial discrimination that complicate the idea of gender.  However feminism has long existed in non-western part of the world, from South America, Asia to Africa, though with slightly adjusted focuses according to the local contexts.

9. Feminism hasn’t changed for ages: Wrong! The first wave of feminism in the 19th hundred and early 20th centuries focused on civil and political equality, mainly women’s rights to vote. The second wave, which began in the 1960s all through the 1980s, widened the goals to include issues of sexuality, family, the workplace, reproductive rights and other legal inequalities. The third-wave feminists broadened the debates to focus on ideas like queer theory, abolishing gender role expectation and stereotypes. The current awareness in feminism – what is arguably sometimes called the fourth-wave feminism – embraces the idea of “intersectionality”, the multiple, interlocking oppressions of race, sex, sexuality and class. It is a movement and awareness that advocate people to make space for those who are marginalised politically, economically and socially because of their gender, sexual preferences, race and class.

10. There’s no need for feminism now because women are equal to men already: This cannot be more wrong.  Let’s revisit the women’s lib’s demands in the 1970s: The first four of them are equal pay, equal opportunity to education and work, a guarantee of their reproductive rights, and an end to violence or sexual coercion regardless of marital status.

Now let’s look at the facts today: According to a report by the UN’s International Labour Organization, women across the world earn only 77 percent of the amount paid to men, a figure that has improved only three percentage points in the past 20 years.  On top of that, many jobs are still not friendly to mothers, and top leadership posts in companies and governments are still overwhelmingly held by men. Secondly, in many developing countries including Indonesia, the number of girls dropping out of school is higher than boys because they are seen by parents as not worth the economic investment. Third, though contraceptives are widely available now, many countries (Indonesia including) still allow child marriage, which perpetuates domestic violence and poverty. Fourth, rape culture is actually thriving both in developed and developing countries alike. In countries like Indonesia, the law and law enforcers on sex violence cases are hardly on women’s side.

In connection to this, I will also show you the remake of Spice Girls video clip which promotes about the gender equality in SDGs as one of UN campaign specifically for women:

#WhatIreallyreallywant

Read more the original article here.